What next?

9 January, 2009
Rat Fink

Friends, hit me with a two-by-four, beam me up and call me James Traficant.

Hollyweird’s all abuzz. Stars and starlets are seriously going to be more conservative in their appearance on red carpets this year. It’s going to make an important statement. Let’s honor those odd little people called Them What Barely Make Ends Meet, and wear the $6,000 Lagerfeld gown instead of the $60,000 Van Cleef & Arpels choker. Don’t do loose hair or puffy lips, and go easy on the Botox. **heavy sigh** It’s going to be tough, but we can do it. Let’s set an example. Cuz, you know, we have to cut corners; times are hard and we don’t want to appear overly ostentatious. I mean really…who’s going to wear “$500 false eyelashes when some people can’t make their mortgage payments?

I know, gosh. I hope they’re going to be OK out there.

Goats are making drugs. I am not making this up.

Again with the smoking. Remove smoking from the movies! OK, I get it. Smoking=bad. Do a Google search on remove smoking movies television and you’ll get a metric ton of hits dedicated to pulling the cancer sticks out of the cinema. Now do another search, but replace the word “smoking” with “drinking.” Feh. We’re just so incredibly picky with our poisons.

Yeesh, I am snarky this morning, aren’t I? And I have used the word “snarky” in two successive posts. I think I’m OK…**feeling face**…do I look all right? I don’t even have a 2-hour delay, so what’s wrong with me? I must be unwell.

Back later. Start without me.

Fink, in a funk

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9 January, 2009 1:04 pm

Wha… so, us famous folks aren’t wearing expensive clothes for award season, huh…I wish someone would of let me know sooner, I’ve already sold a kidney to help pay for this walking stick. It’s cost $16,000… but it’s made out of Elephant bone, so you know it’s worth it.


Rat Fink Reply:

You rich folks, I swear…


kodye Reply:

Are very rich and attractive? I agree. Hahaha (Rich famous person laugh)


9 January, 2009 7:00 pm

I’m in Las Vegas right now at the CES show. Being a “booth babe” is one of my favorite things to do!


9 January, 2009 7:06 pm

OK…what just happened? This HP laptop that I’m using has a mind of it’s own… I didn’t click anything & all of a sudden, the first sentence I wrote got posted! Now I know why HP gave us all these computers for free – they are posessed!! As I was trying to say, one of the fascinating things about being in Vegas for the CES show is that the adult entertainment industry runs their yearly expo/show at the same time. I wish I had the concession on silicon & saline implants for all the gals I’ve seen running around the… Read more »