Random Neuron Firings
Thought for a Monday morning: Do you ever say to yourself, “I need to start writing down these things”? I do, every time I have a really ridiculous or bizarre thought. And believe me, I have many, and on a regular basis, to wit:
- The time is coming when can openers will be obsolete. I grabbed a can of soup and a can of peaches to put in my lunch box this morning, and they both had the pull tabs on them. That got me thinking: I rarely use my can opener anymore. Do you find that as well?
- I am absolutely repulsed by hot tubs. I know I’m the lonely rat cheese on that one, most likely. But the very thought of several dirty butts simmering in the same gurgly stew while their owners eat and drink (and probably swallow the occasional butt-infused water droplet) is so utterly repugnant to me, I can’t get past it. But seeing how it’s 5:26 a.m., I know I have to. And speaking of butts…
- Professional journalism is also on its way to obsolete. You wouldn’t think that a newspaper writer would use the word “butt” in the title of a serious piece of writing, and yet…
- And while you’re reading the above article, you may also notice that polite discourse is going out the window, too. Remember the days of honest letters to the editor? You know, the ones where you gave your real name? They are few and far between nowadays, because it’s a lot more fun to post anonymously so you can get on your inner troll and ride. Each time I see this, I lose a little more faith in what (I fear) makes up the bedrock of the human psyche. Are we really predisposed to cruelty if no one knows who we are? Are we a tribe of one-uppers as homo sapiens, or just as Americans? I’d point to it as a fluke — the rantings of the occasional idiot — but fiends, it’s everywhere.
I have dozens more of these, but I’ll ration them out for the occasional weirdness post. So tell me: do you have any of those “why do hot dogs come in packages of 10, but buns come in packages of 8” type RNFs? Do you, at any time, say, “Hmm, I feel orange today”? Share the oddities; it’ll take your mind off the fact that you have five more days before you can put your feet up again.