- whoever stole my debit card information to buy video games in California, and
- Chase Fraud (a hilarious moniker, yes?), for making me sit on hold for 22 minutes at 5:20 a.m. EST (when EVERYONE calls to report fraud, apparently) only to tell me that you’re all so incredibly busy hearing about the sieve that is your security system, no one can talk to me after all, and that you will call me later on this morning,
A) WHILE I AM AT SCHOOL AND UNABLE TO TALK TO YOU, AND B) WHILE THE THIEF CONTINUES TO USE MY MONEY.
Dear God: Please help me to not kill people today (over the phone, that is). Amen.
J’ever have one of those mornings?